1) To make it straight, she pulls it. To make it stand, she rubs it.
To make it stiff, she licks it. To put it in, she pushes it. It is
a hell of a job threading a needle!!!
2) A guy donated blood to his girlfrind. When they broke up, he
wanted his blood back.
The girl threw a bloody kotex at him and said, 'I'll pay you in
monthly installment.'
3) Girl in cinema turns sideways and whispers to her boyfriend. 'The
man next to me is masturbating!' Bf: 'Ignore him.' Gf: 'I can't.' Bf:
'Why not?' Gf: 'He is using my hand!'
4) The Bio teacher draws a huge PENIS on the board and asks 'Does
anybody know what this is? Dirty Harry says 'Oh, it's a penis and
you know dad's got 2 of them?'
The teacher says '2 of them?' Harry says 'ya. The little one he uses
to pee and the
big one to brush mum's teeth.'
5) 4 miracles of a woman
Getting wet without taking a shower
Bleeding without getting hurt
Giving milk without eating grass
Making boneless meat hard
6) What is the smallest hotel in the world? The answer is 'Vagina
Inn' It accomodates only 1 standing occupant with his 2 baggages left
outside.
7) Unborn twins saw a penis approaching
1st: Papa coming, papa coming
2nd: U fool, it's uncle lah. Papa never comes with raincoat!
8) A hubby said to his wife, ' I will take a photo of your breast and
frame it.' The wife said to husband, 'I will take a photo of your
penis and enlarge it.'
9) A girl at 15 is a SURPRISE. At 25, she is the RIGHT PRICE. At
35, a GRAND PRIZE. At 45, a CONSOLATION PRIZE. At 55, she is a DOOR
PRIZE and at 65,
a GIVAWAY PRIZE.
10) What did Snow White complain about after having sex with the 7 dwarfs?
Snow White said, ' I would rather have 7 inches at 1 time. Not 1 inch 7 times.'
11) The vagina is the world's best rehabilatation center. Even the
most violent and aggresive penis comes out humbled, head bowed and
reduced in size.
12) A loving husband had 'I Love You' tattoed on his dick. When he
got home, he showed it to his wife. She said, 'There u go again
trying to put words in my mouth.'
13) Lady was trying on dress. Husband: 'Your bum is as big as a BBQ
pit!' Later in bed,
husband said, 'Want to do it?' Wife: 'It's a waste lighting up a BBQ
pit for a small sausage.'
