A million thoughts running through my mind bout what to blog, yet I just couldn't. Reason being, the post would be too wordy or I just couldn't find a way to phrase it in a nicer way. Well, maybe that's life. We have a lot of things in mind, yet no courage to post them.

Alright, so I went to the Science Center with Baby, Junyan and Eddie this afternoon. A nice, cool and enjoyable trip with the guys. Experiment with many of the facilities over there. The facts about everything little thing thats happen everyday in our life sudden'y come to life. hahah! Maybe that how we miss all those small details in our life and hence at times, we would regret for not doing stuff. The most funny part was when e three guys see how they used to look and how they will look in the future with a machine. LOL, shall upload that soon!! hhahha! DAME funny.. and yes. as usual. Prata for dinner. LOL, YUMMy.

I hate spitting HEADACHE!! :( They causes me not being able to concentrate and think properly.. :(:(:(

alright short post today... silence is gold afterall.. LOL. no link ahhaha! night.

If U're in a relationship, married or none, read this. U'll know why at the end.

MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

A CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE IS A MARRIAGE THAT IS SURE TO LAST A LIFETIME.

So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. Matthew 19:6.

By Stephanie Halmilton

How many times have u misunderstood someone just because of the things they post or the things they say? Ask yourself this question seriously. For me, I do, especially when it comes to relationships like the way he choose to tell me certain things. At times, i would not like the way he speak, and at times i would misunderstand his real meaning in a message. well, i mean this is rather common right? But the thing is how did we even allow ourselves to misunderstood others, that the key to everything.

A most easy and accessible form of communication, yet can cos so many misunderstanding between 2 person. that kinda weird isn't it? is it because we personally have some grudges against that particular person or was it our mind is just playing a trick with us? It is of course good if the problem is solve, but what if it wasn't? and remains there, what would e 2 person eventually turns out to be? still friends or enemy?

well. this doesn't really happens between me and him, though it does but we normally would solve it. But the problems comes when it happen between other people. as in, that their misunderstanding for us. LOL. kinda funny. How people use to be close and now this. But well, I believe everything happens for a reason be it good or bad. Just like my breakup with him, it allows us to really know and understand what we want in our relationship. and from that, we were able to communicate better with each other, being even more open than we use to be and of course, loving each other more.

come to think of it, i shall end my post here.. :D goodnight everyone..

baby, i love you!!

Many a times, people only know what they really wants after they have lost it, but it doesn't mean whatever they have lost will come back to them.

For me, I'm indeed a lucky girl from the day I've know him. He may not be the perfect guy to everyone, or in fact, a super kiddish guy. But to me, he is equal to my everything. Or should i say, he fills up all my imperfections and at the same time, not taking away any of my little gimmicks that I always have..

Let's not side-track, i just want to share a little story between us that happens recently. Being a very young couple, in the sense of our relationship very new, we always quarrel. It can be the smallest thing that starts from a very small disagreement. According to many people, it WAS suppose to be the so called 'honeymoon' period, which is also the sweetest moment in our lives, but apparently not so for our case.

Just that day, I was angry with him reason being he couldn't attend some of the outings which he had already promised sometime back, in another way, I wasn't angry with him. But I felt that life was really unfair to us, why is it that we have to face so much trouble. Just the day before that, as he was running to chase his bus, he fell and hurt his chin and jaw which requires 6 stitches to close back the wound. That's a very big "OUCH"! His parent was worried, and I just felt guilty, and thinking back of all the past quarrels that we have, could it be better if we give each other more time to know as friends before taking the next steps. After quite some time, I finally found the courage and send him the message saying that well, let's break. It wasn't easy to say that, and even worse, while waiting for the reply. The reply wasn't shocking, but heart-breaking.

Apparently we couldn't bear being separated for more than 24 hours, and we gave way. To both our feelings and our heart. Well, I mean I am glad for that, at least we know what we really want deep down, at least we are being tied together.

Thanks baby, for everything. For always being there for me, just like my guardian angel. Thanks, I Love You!